My Drug of Choice

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My Drug of Choice

Can’t fully remember, and yet I can’t fully forget.

Who are you, stranger?

Stranger still, who am I?

What secrets bind us together and tear us apart? What miracles? What hell?

I feel you in my shadow, growing in the darkness.

At sunrise I hear you whisper of light and glory and power.

My drug, of choice. Withdrawal, I suffer.

Hating that I loved you.

Loving that I had you.

Having not to need you.

Needing not to want you.

Wanting to turn back the hands of time.

The hands that tied the knot that made the noose that took my breath, my life, my soul.

A ghost now, wandering.

Wondering if I can find…a doctor…a medic…a mortician.

Make me fully alive, or make me fully dead.

Make me fully remember.

Or make me fully forget.

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